more nvc/compassionate communication stuff

[lobolance]

mostly posting these links so I can find them again, but if anyone else is interested...

http://www.nfnc.org/docs/marshall.html

... I'd come across references to Jackal and Giraffe, so here they are explained. I think this article is aimed at parents. In any case I like the way he goes into being in the present, wanting others to choose something of their own free will (and providing the opportunity for that), and owning one's owns wants (which lead to feelings).

"Giraffes say what they do want; rather than what they don't want."

This page also talks some about responding to hearing "no", which seems rather inevitable

Another quote, which I still need to work on: "Once you've learned to hear the heart behind any message, you
discover that there's nothing to fear in anything another person says."

It's interesting to think about all of this in terms of D/s relationships, too.

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http://www.talkinghearts.com/HEART_TALK/QUESTIONS_and__ANSWERS/Compassionate-Communication.html

this one has a reasonable response to dealing with someone who's really emotional.

Gotta say the pics of these trainers/coaches whatever on the individual pages make me want to gag... or smack 'em. ;-) I perceive them to be so stereotypically white/wealthy/nothing is ever *really* hard... which is no doubt a misservice, but geez, get out of the polo shirts! :-) (ok, I do my fair share of judging!)

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http://www.talkinghearts.com/HEART_TALK/QUESTIONS_and__ANSWERS/Handling_a_Partner_s_Criticism/handling_a_partner_s_criticism.html

this one is about dealing with criticism.